Bye for now Baby Chons

Since the start of the year 2014, Jet and I are planning to have a second child. Matt, also being makulit that he is already a big boy and want to have a baby sister or baby brother. Since I have PCOS, and after 3 months of trying I went again to a fertility expert last June,exactly celebrated my 32nd birthday! Imagine almost the whole day of my birthday I was in the clinic and waiting for  my doctor. My new infertility doctor was so in demand, imagine she has 50 patients in a day. To avoid stress, and due to typhoon, conflict schedules I stopped my check up. I decided to continue once we move to our old new house na lang.

I was delayed for more than a week last August and I thought dadating din ang mens ko. But when I had a pregnancy test I got surprised seeing 2 lines! To think that I don't have any follicle monitoring etc.,

We are all excited! My son gave a name pa, he said the name of the baby is Baby Chons! 

I super appreciate how my son is being so proud and point out my tummy to tell his playmates that he will be Kuya na! He wanted us to call him Kuya Joaquin.

But sadly, the sac did not developed as it should be, At 11weeks there is no heartbeat, no baby and only a sac that measures 5weeks. I decided to have D and C (raspa) last September 24 to remove the sac.  

I thought I was okay emotionally and I accepted the situation after praying before the operation. But hindi pa pala. When I brought to my room after my operation. My sister was the only one waiting for me in my room and she said my tears are flowing.  I was unconscious and did not know I was crying pala. That moment I only see myself  waving my hand and saying "BYE BYE BABY CHONS! BYE BYE! WE LOVE YOU!"

The operation was quick and I fell asleep immediately after the anesthesia was injected. Then I woke up I am already delivered to my room, My sister was wiping my tears and heard her "Ate, wag ka na umiyak, naiiyak na din  ako eh."

I know Papa God has better plans for us.. I still Thank HIM for giving me chance to get pregnant again. I will wait and hope we will be blessed for another healthy baby, in HIS time..

Mommy's Letter for Angel Baby Chons

Dear Angel Baby Chons, 

Just yesterday, the doctor removed you from my womb. I know that you were not there yet, but in my heart and my mind I know I am keeping a baby inside. The operation was fast it didn't hurt mommy much because of the anesthesia. What hurt most darling, is that I will never get the chance to hold you in my arms. I will never get the chance to breastfeed, kiss you, play with you...

Your Kuya Joaquin, loves you so dearly and was so excited to give you a name. He said you are Baby Chons, I don't know what is he thinking why he gave you that name but I know that name came from his heart. 

The moment I learned that I was pregnant with you is the same happiness I felt in my heart when I got pregnant with your Kuya Joaquin. 

Baby Chons, I understand that you are not ready in our world. Don't worry I will explain that to your kuya. I know that you still want to be an angel and to be beside Papa Jesus. 

I am sorry if there are things that I didn't do or things that I have done when I was pregnant with you. 
I am sorry if I sleep late and do my work or I should take my metformin as my maintenance for PCOS. I am very sorry my dear.. 

Please get back to mommy's tummy when you are ready. We will pray to Papa God for both of us to be healthy when that right time comes. 

I do really believe God has better plans for us. I love you and you will be forever in our hearts. 

Be an angel to our family.  We love you. Bye..


Love, 
Mommy Joan

Happy 5th year Anniversary

Hooray for Five years Blissfully Marriage Life! Time flies really fast, and when I looked at our Wedding Pictures, I must say "Tumatanda na nga kami!" haha.  We don't have any plans going out of town or exchanging gifts with each other. Because we could not afford this time. haha. But, we are all excited to move to our Old New House! Our very nice gift from God Above! Yes, all of our budgets, savings are spent for our Old New House. But we spent with buffet dinner at Guevarra's together with our bagets! 

Our little Kuya, with kulit pose with his Dadda

Happy Anniversary to us!

Dinner buffet at Guevarra's by Chef Lau

We enjoyed the food!

Found these hats, my son's idea us to wear it and take pictures!

PS. I am pregnant and we are still hoping to see our baby's heartbeat for our next check up.

Happy 5th Anniversary to us! Thank you Papa God for blessing our family more than enough! Please continue to bless us with LOVE, RESPECT and with YOU as center of our Family. And please, a baby sister for my Son.